CHAPTER 12
Arnav's heart beat stopped in fear for a millisecond when he saw Khushi at the door. V
Sunaina's heart beat had finally resumed seeing her there, but just for a fraction of second before the door opened and the time between it fully opened and Khushi came into her view, she was too swept away by the wave of fear thinking it might be someone who really should not be coming there at the moment. Not because she was afraid of being caught in a compromising position but she wanted only Khushi to come.
"Mr. Raizada, I think you have drunk a lot tonight," she muttered in his ear. He looked at her momentarily and nodded.
"Yes, Ms. Fernandez," he stuttered. "We will sign the papers tomorrow," he said, when after a long time of struggle he remembered why exactly he had come to study along with her. And then seeing Khushi standing at the door his heart raised.
He saw Sunaina's hand on his arm, Sunaina observed his very act closely, he lightly swept her hand away without being rude. Her teeth clenched when he did so. Then he took a step towards Khushi as if she did not exist.
That little moment gave her the snapshot of a truth that Arnav was far from her reach, probably the infinity distance between them was not going to lessen. She gave herself a mental slap for thinking that she can't get what she want. She crossed her arms against her chest, and plastered a smile on her face as if it Arnav going to Khushi didn't bother her. For tonight, she had to let him go to her, because if her plan went well she was ready to play her next move. And she was confident that it will happen just the way she thinks. In reality, if it did, she was ahead of her time.
Arnav due to the drug was having difficult walking without being clumsy. And due to the vision impairment he couldn't see the exact emotions on Khushi's face. But he knew she must be upset. He just hoped that she waited for him to say a word, if she walked away he would once again be defeated.
In that fear he tried to walk faster, but he tripped. Khushi immediately ran to help him. "Arnav."
Arnav shook his head to focus, but as far as he knew he hadn't drunken that much then the intoxication he was feeling. "Arnav, aap theek toh ho?" (Are you alright?)
He smiled happiely seeing her for him,
"Yes..." he stuttered.
She put his arm around her shoulder. "Arnav, let's go to the room, you need rest."
"Take good care of him," Sunaina said from behind and smirked. Khushi shut her eyes in anger, but she thought she had better things to do then worry to comfront her.
Khushi walked him to the room. "Arnav, please sit here," she said, and she made him sit on a bed. "Arnav, I take your clothes out of the closet, get changed, then go to bed."
He held her hand before she could take a step towards a cupboard. He had to make himself and situation clear before there was another misunderstanding between them, that he now did not want. "Arnav, stay seated," she said, when he got up on his feet.
He shook his head as he had his priorities set.
"I am fine, Khushi. Khushi, I need to talk to you..."
Khushi looked into his eyes, and saw his struggle to get his words put together and then bring it on his mouth. She saw him closing his eyes for a while, as he was assembling his thoughts and preparing his words. And may be she knew what was coming. He took his time, and she was ready to wait to listen what he had to say from his mouth.
"Khushi," he said. "Whatever you saw today in the study was nothing. I was quite drunk, one drink, never hurt me, but today it feels as if I have drunk ten bottles. Khushi, there is nothing in between me and Sunaina. It's just that she was helping me, I tripped..."
He wanted her to say something, but then he wanted himself to finish. "Khushi, I.Love.you.," he said. Something she wasn't expecting to hear from him. Her eyes widened in shock, and they filled with tears. Tear slipped down her cheeks.
"This I never able to say to you, but saying it you now."
"Did I ask you for any explanation?" she asked, as she laugh through her tears. His confession of love had made her alive once again.
For a moment, he thought she didn't believe him and then he thought of what she said, her words, he smiled, and hugged her.
"Khushi, I know I have hurt you, but please forgive me," he muttered. He only hugged as tightly as he could, without hurting her. Tears mercilessly flowed down her eyes, drenching his shoulder.
"It's me who have hurt you..."
He shushed her and she didn't say another word, she knew tonight she had him. For forever. For something that she had waited. Every second, every minute, in five years. And that every moment was tough, was an underestimation. However, it was true that this moment was worth waiting. He wasn't in his senses, but whatever he had said was from his heart.
Arnav felt relief as a living object running within his veins. As an oilment giving relief to his burns. Till moment he had lived half, now to the fullest when he had said finally what he longed for. He pulled away from the hug.
"I love you too, Arnav ji," she said too.
He cupped her face. Seeing tears in his eyes, her heart ached. She wiped them before hugging each other again.
***
"I will be back soon!" he said.
Khushi watch him go, she walked to close the door.
There stood Sunaina. "Hi, Mrs. Raizada," she said, moving her gaze from her perfectly manicured black painted nails to her. Khushi found it completely inappropriate.
"Ms. Sunaina, don't you think you should be leaving from here?" she asked, even though she was now getting her on nerves, she still trying to deal with her calmly.
"Shot of a future!" she reminded her.
"What do you want?"
"Arnav Singh Raizada, give him to me. Otherwise, I will keep on making your life hell."
Khushi clenched her fist. "Ms. Fernandez, you are dreaming. Arnav is my husband, not a thing that you will ask for me to share and I will give it you..."
"You talking about such things, look at yourself, what you did. Even you took a place of Mr. Raizada's first wife."
"You can think whatever you want to...My husband loves me and he has proved it already..." she said, confidently.
Sunaina raised her eyebrows. "Hmm..."
"Mrs. Raizada, even I have waited quite a lot to get him..."
"Why now?"
She laughed. "I was so waiting for you to ask me this question. Good...But to that I won't answer now...Because I don't want to...Good night. Have fun."
When she heard knob of the washroom turn Khushi closed the door on her face. She took a deep breath.
"What happen, why did you close the door so angrily?" he asked.
She turned around and smiled, "sorry, by mistake," she said.
"Oh!" he said, and fell on the bed tired. "You can go and change as well."
She nodded and went to change, but more than a need to change she needed to have a chat with herself. It had been important for her to find about Sunaina. For sure she wasn't in their life for no reason, she had it very clear. Especially, when she said she had waited. Arnav had been away for two years from her, if she wanted she could have gotten him by now, but why now, when he was back to his family?
She went back into the room to Arnav. He was waiting for her to come. She smiled and switched off the room light. Light lamps lit the room.
She sat on the bed and shortly laid back and faced Arnav. What she would say to him? And same question Arnav asked himself. Even though their minds were bombarded with questions that they wanted to ask each other.
He kept his hand on her hand. "It has been a long wait."
Tear slipped down her eyes, that went unseen, soaked by the pillow.
"Not yet complete..." she said, when she thought of Sunaina and her intensions.
"Khushi, I ask you today, can we forget everything and start a new life with each other, and our daughter?"
"For us..."
"For. Us." he repeated.
Tum ko paa hi liya
Maine yoon
Jaise main hoon
Ehsaas tera
Paas main tere hoon
Tumko paa hi liya
Paa hi liya Maine yoon...
"Tell me it's not a dream, Arnav," she said, being unclear that how come everything was falling in place. He slipped his hand and on top of her hand. She felt as if her destiny was making fun of her or even trying to trick her showing this beautiful dream.
Jahaan mein
Jahaan pe bhi
Seene se laga le
Main toh hui ab tere hawaale
Bandishe naa rahi
She looked at his hand that for the first time in ages she felt as a guard and swept her with a positive energy. She forgot everything, her every tension.
"I promise I won't let you down as I had been..." he said. "I know I shouldn't have kept myself away from you, when you needed me the most."
"You know why were you doing this..."
He shook his head. "It was wrong. I failed to understand you first. And then instead of seeking forgiveness, I ignored myself, my health, and one day left you, alone. Knowing that you were hurt. Second time I hurt you when I asked you to leave Italy, knowing that I haven't done anything to gain your trust. But believe me I would have taken care of you, and then only to prove that I didn't want to hurt our child or want it by taking it from you, another endless year. Then I came back when I longer kept myself from you and Hazel. That had been mean of me, Khushi. I had been selfish. But believe me, I was never angry at you. I failed to understand you that's the truth."
Tum ko paa hi liya
Paa hi liya
Maine yoon
Jaise main hoon ehsaas tera
Paas main tere hoon
Khushi never understood that more than being mad he was actually living his life in a regret. She kept her hand on his hand in an understanding. And the other moment he slowly pulled her towards himself.
kabhi tu..
Kahin pe bhi ab na dhoondna mujhe
Main har jagah miloongi ab tujhe
Tum ko paa hi liya
Paa hi liya Maine yoon
Tu jaane ya main jaanoon ye
Saath main tere hoon
"Khushi, forget everything. And forgive your parents. Please, don't be mad. I was equally mad at them for ruining our lives. But becoming a father of a girl I realised a concern a father and a mother have towards their child."
Khushi laid on her back to face him...
"Will you be able to forgive your family?" she asked. Look on his face completely told her that he had no answer to her asked question.
"My parents brought their own fears in between. Being worried for your child is okay, but trying to make it a mess, especially knowing where their child's happiness resides is not okay."
"Khushi, children often do mistakes, and parents always fogives them..."
Khushi was quite now. "I am tired of it," she said, feeling defeated. And her words itself gave away the notion how beaten up she was by her life.
Arnav hugged her. "I promise I will not let anyone come in between us, Khushi. Now it will be all about us. Not me or about you, but us."
Feeling tonne of weight off her shoulder by her words and being in his arms she felt her soul finally at peace. Arnav kissed her forehead. And then wiped her tears.
His hand curled in hers and he captured her lips on her approval.
Chapter 13
Khushi got a message from Payal to get ready for the office party. Now she was worried, wondering why Arnav hadn't asked her to be ready for the party, instead?
She constantly checked her iPhone, almost after every other second, to see if he had called her, or messaged her, or if she by mistake had turned the notifications off (which she had not), when she heard nothing from him.
In the morning, she was busy in household chores to talk to him, and later he had left for the office. Fears made her sweat in agony, and she couldn't get to disappear the disturbing thoughts out of her mind, not even for a second.
Clock struck 7:00 PM, Arnav still wasn't home when Payal, Akaash, and Shaya Aman had already left for the party after waiting for him to come. She herself could not find the courage to call him.
Past eight hours were the hardest hours of her life, not that two years without him was easy for her to spend.
Hope revived in her heart when she heard footsteps, and finally Arnav appeared at the door, she took a sigh of relief. She was already standing up from the chair. Seeing him completely wet she ran down to him, after grabbing a towel from the cupboard. "Arnav, how did you get?" she asked, worried.
He took towel from her, instead of letting her help him wipe. She felt as if he was trying to keep a distance from her. But for a moment she let go of every worry, and rushed to get his dry clothes.
"My car broke down. Since driver was gone home early I was on my own. Tried to fix the car myself due to that got wet in the rain," he answered.
"Arnav, you should have called me, I would have come. "
He shook his head, "It was not of a big issue, I got it fixed by myself!" he lied rather than telling her that he had gotten wet in the rain just because he spent time standing by the road on his way back home when he was having hard time figuring out how he would ask her about last night.
Even though he thought he was ready to talk to her, he found himself lack of firmness once again when she was in front of him. "Khushi!" he said, thinking that he had to start this conversation somehow. But hazel interupted when she came running in the room knowing that her father was home.
"Good evening, daddy!" she wished.
Upon seeing his daughter, for a moment, he forgot everything. He squat down on the floor and kissed her cheeks since he couldn't pick her in his arms. "Good evening, my princess."
"Daddy, you were playing in the rain as well...?"
Arnav laughed.
"No, I wasn't!"
"But I did!" she said, sticking her tongue out, nervously.
He looked at Khushi questioningly, but he didn't say anything to her.
"Hazel, you know that you fell sick and you decided to get wet in the rain?"
"I stopped her but she didn't listen me!" Khushi chimed in, to see if he was estranging himself from her.
Arnav looked back at hazel and raised his eyebrow at her. She grinned.
"Hazel, if mommy says no to something it means it is no," he said in a stern tone to make himself clear.
"I am sorry, daddy, I promise I would listen to mommy next time," she said, and kissed his cheek to calm his anger, knowing very well that it will help her.
"Okay, now go. Me and mommy will see you in the morning."
"Daddy, can't we kids go to the party, please?"
"No," he answered. "It's a party for big people."
"Okay, daddy. You change your clothes otherwise you will fall sick!" she said. He smiled at her concern. "Good night, daddy. Good night, mommy!"
"Good night!" they both wished their daughter, she ran out of the room singing and dancing.
Arnav smiled vanished when he looked at Khushi and rose up on his feet.
"Why aren't you ready yet?" he asked. She apologised and told him to give him few minutes to get ready, instead he stopped her. Khushi stopped abruptly. Her heart beat like a drum in her chest.
He prepared himself to get himself to ask her whatever was in his mind. He wished she didn't turn around so that way it was easy for him to talk to her. But she did slowly turned around to face him. He found himself in a nervous situation again. In that point of time he forgot to breathe.
He tried to grab hold on his nerves and spoke very slowly and measurably.
"Last night I was drunk, did I do or say anything wrong?" he finally asked.
Khushi's world came crashing in front of her own sight. A fear that she was trying to ignore was actually coming true. A fear that he didn't remember anything that happened last night.
Look on her face killed his body, his soul. He thought his body might gave up on him. He couldn't imagine anything worse than that. He walked up to her in slow three steps. His heart slowly broke into pieces.
Khushi was still in dismay that he remembered nothing of a last night, neither his heartfelt confession, nor the moment of them being one.
"Did I do anything wrong?" he asked. "Did I force you?" His guilt couldn't stop striping his soul naked, her silence didn't do any good either.
"I...I remember me and you were together last night, but did...Did I force myself on you?" he asked.
Khushi couldn't get herself to believe that she was mistaking him, he did remember that they were one last night.
She was finally breathing. Her world was assembling back with the right pieces at the exact right places.
"I don't remember anything of such but I did do what I shouldn't have," his own voice wasn't with him. Guilt lacerated him slowly, gradually.
On the other hand, Khushi didn't understand till now what exactly relief meant.
She raised her hand to cup his face. Arnav looked at her in confusion, and thought he might die any moment. Whole day he had been in guilt.
"You didn't force me, Arnav!" she said. "Even in your drunk state you were in your senses..."
He now let lump slip down his throat that threatened him of his life. He raked his hand in his hair in a complete relief.
He moved her hand away, and walked backwards, until his back of the knees hit the bed and he fell on the bed.
"You shouldn't have let me touch you!" he said, being unable to look in her eyes. But then he rose up quickly and again stood in front of her. "You aren't saying it to me to make me feel better!" he asked, as once again he was afraid.
"You didn't do any wrong!" She said, feeling completely upset that for him last night was just a guilt of touching her. Yes, he was right she was in her senses and shouldn't have just carried away with the emotions. But it felt a reality.
"We are getting late, we should get ready and leave for the party..." she said.
For him party wasn't important, to clear his fears were. He stopped her...
"Tell me this is the truth!" he said. She turned once again to see him.
"I swear on Hazel, Arnav. You didn't force me...If I am lying I wish I take not an another breath..."
He kept his finger on her lips and shook his head.
There was not any other proof that she could have given him that he didn't force himself on her.
"Don't ever say that again, Khushi," he pleaded. "The only reason I was asking again was because in a drunk state I have said you so many wrong things in the past. Again I don't remember the word I said to you, but due to the vague memory I remember what really happened between us. I promised that I won't touch alcohol again in my life but I did."
Khushi didn't know how to tell him that he was not drunk on his own wish. Her hands clenched in anger at the thought of Sunaina. God knows what was her intentions. And even she tried to tell him about Sunaina, she was aware she wouldn't have proved her wrong, she had no proof of any sought. She wouldn't have proved that she wanted...
***
"To separate them," she said. "I have promised that I will separate them and I promise I will do so. Otherwise, I won't even be able to die. I would snatch Mr. Raizada from her and she will not be able to do anything. Nothing. I get what I like anyways. And to get Mr. Arnav Singh Raizada I could do anything. Even kill her."
***
Arnav saw her out of her dressing room. His breath hitched in his throat. His mind was bugging him to tell her that she looked absolutely beautiful in that off white Georgette Saree with beautiful embroidered Sequins border and embroidered Sequins blouse. He stole gazes while she was busy checking herself in the mirror if everything was right with her saree.
She had perfectly matched with his black coat and white shirt. He had his ties in his hands, till now he was having hard time selecting which one to tie. But seeing her saree, he knew he had to go for a daffodil gold coloured tie to match her golden sequin blouse.
He put his other ties aside. When Khushi turned and he saw her once again carefully, tie slipped down his hand.
When she was going to look at him, he looked away. She walked towards him, he looked at her through the nook of his eyes. She bent on her knees to pick his tie from the floor.
She closed the cupboard door and turned back to swung tie over his head, that he chose to knot. He loved her this gesture. He had decided instead of running away he had to face her and his family. They were his, no matter even if they decided on to not support him. But that was the time when he needed them the most. This always made it hard for him to accept them back in his life. Times he had given himself were tough. Living without a family was hard and coming back to them only give him cold chills what if it all will be taken away from him once again.
"Done!" she said, and later helped him wear his coat.
"You look beautiful!" he finally said, what his tongue tickled him to say, even though he tried to control his tongue. Hearing from him that she looked beautiful, her cheeks turned into a crimson red. Even darker then her rosey blush.
She so wanted to look back herself in the mirror to see what she had done to gain a compliment from him. Did she really look beautiful., she thought. She had done nothing special, just a normal make up.
Arnav saw her trying to not able to look in her eyes. A ghost of nervous smile played on her flushed face.
"Thank you!" she said, stuttering.
"Get your shawl, its little cold outside!" he added. She nodded.
He waited for her when she went to retrieve shawl and her clutch from the closet. She came back and they both left their room.
"Did you go to the doctor today?" he asked.
"Yes, I did when I went to get Hazel's check done."
"Yes, it was her check up day as well...What did her doctor say?"
"She is doing fine, infection is still there, but she said she will be okay. She has cut down her medicine to one tablet a day until her next check up."
"And your doctor? What did she say?"
"She said nothing to worry about!" she answered.
"How was your day?"
"It was busy!" he said.
***
Seeing Sunaina present in the party irked Khushi. Sunaina too looked at her. She waved her hand looking at Arnav and smirked seeing Khushi.
She walked down to them.
"Welcome!" she amused. "Mr. Raizada, I am so glad that you made it on time to my party. Everyone had been just asking about you. Hi, Mrs. Raizada!"
Khushi didn't know that she was the one who had kept a party.
Arnav didn't hear Khushi's response. He felt her hand slipping around his arm.
"Khushi, Ms. Fernandez is saying hello."
She looked up at him, and then at Sunaina. "Hi!" She answered.
"Mrs. Raizada, your sister-in-laws are waiting for you, come! I am sorry, Mr. Raizada, that I am grabbing your wife for a moment."
"Sure, it's not a problem!" he said. Khushi stared at Arnav when Sunaina took her away.
However, she was glad that she herself pulled her out of the crowd. She didn't take her where Payal and Shaya were. The moment they both stood in the corridor where they only two were present, Khushi could no longer control her anger. She slapped her without any warning.
Sunaina for a second didn't even know what really happened. Except for the fact that her right ear was now buzzing. Her hand fisted in a tight fist.
She almost immediately swallowed her anger.
"Last night you were lucky that I didn't get a chance to do this..."
Sunaina's face was red in anger.
"Since now I was thinking that it's okay, like every girl you are infautated. But you had now been crossing your limits...What do you think you will be able to get my husband like this? Let me tell you, miss Fernandez, come out of your love sick mind, it will only hurt you. I am only saying it you so you don't get hurt. Even if you able to get him somehow, he will never be able to love you back. He can compromise with you, but love. Yes. I have hurt him many a times, I regret it. But you are no one to tell if I deserve my husband. And who you are to point out my mistakes, anyways? Do you have any self respect? He is a married man and have a child who is his life line. And I know you might not want to believe it but he loves me too. He needs a time to forgive me, and I am giving him. Even though I have to spend my whole life in seek of his forgiveness...This slap was not because you are admanant to get him, but because of whatever you did last night, he got hurt. Next time if you tried to do anything of this sought, I won't mind telling him your intentions. The only reason I have not is because I want you to understand before you loss your image in front of him. Do not blind yourself. You might hurt our relationship but be careful you might yourself as well. Get a grip of right and wrong before it is too late. If that is not going in your head, I promise, I will help you..."
Sunaina finally controlled her anger and leant against the wall and laughed.
"Are you done or you have to say more? You are so good at lecturing. Let me tell you, you do whatever, I will get what I want, that's all! And this slap, will cost you, I will make sure, it does.
"Ms. Sunaina, if that is so, let me tell you, you can try everything in this world, you can use any power, but you will not be able to do anything to get what you want."
Sunaina smiled. So relaxed she seemed. Unaffected by her every talk.
"Mrs. Raizada, you are wasting your time by arguing with me, he is all yours at this moment. So enjoy. But beware! One month! I promise, within a month he will be with me," she openly challenged her.
"This is my promise as well, Ms. Sunaina, use the whole power of yours or even get the whole world on your side, my husband will always remain mine. I asked why you came now when you had two years to get him, I tell you in those two years he didn't find anyone else, why now?"
"Because he didn't find me!" she said. "You have made some big mistakes of whom I will be taking advantage of."
"What are you referring too?" Khushi asked, in a low scared tone.
"Instead of worrying what am I referring too, think how will you spend this one month with him. Because after that he will be mine. I never learnt to fail in my life..."
Khushi understood she was one heck of a strong headed woman not going to listen.
Sunaina pulled her hand forward for a hand shake, but Khushi didn't bother too. "I have better things to do in my life!"
Sunaina shrugged her shoulder and left.
Khushi questioned herself, why she even doing anyways? Arnav was not a thing that they both were fighting over. She wondered what really did she knew about her that was going to turn her world upside down. Or she was just taking advantage of the distances of them in their relationship.
Then something ticked in her mind, out of nowhere. Her parents thought came into her mind. She didn't know why she was thinking it was them who might have asked her to separate her from Arnav. Somewhere to her it sounded valid and much more reasonable. And then the other moment she was doubtful. Can they have their hands in this? Because, otherwise there was no one who could have known about their life this closely.
Before she could come to any conclusion, she had to know who really she was? Her complete identity.
***
"Khushi, where had you gone?" Arnav asked, in a worry when he finally found her outside the venue in a corridor.
"I...Had gone to the washroom!" she said.
Looking at her face, he could tell she was upset over something. "Khushi, is everything alright? You don't look fine."
She wanted to leave the party, but at the same time she didn't want Arnav to feel worried about anything.
"I am fine, nothing to worry about."
"You sure?!"
She nodded. "Alright, let's go!" he said.
***
"Hey, Khushi, where did you go missing?" Payal asked.
"Hi, bhabi! I went to the washroom.
"Oh alright!"
"Bhabi, you look beautiful, I am sure Arnav bhai must be unable to keep his eyes off you!" shaya muttered in her ear. Khushi blushed and looked at Arnav standing in a distance, with his friends and Sunaina was no where to be seen. Even though she had no interest where she go but question did arise in her mind not seeing her in the party.
***
"Mr. Raizada, it's really good to see you back to India!" Mr. Mehta said.
Arnav understood his motive behind his statement. Who didn't know why he was away from India after speculations were riding high in the media and never to settle down just like the fate of any other rumour.
Akaash saw his brother standing feeling uncomfortable. He understood what he might be going through.
"Arnav, can you come with me?!" he said, just so that he could get him his space.
He nodded, but he left and made his way outside. Akaash followed him.
"Are you okay, chote?"
He nodded.
"Don't let anything to get to your heart!"
"I am okay!" he said. "I just feel suffocated..."
They both fell silent for a moment.
"Did you sign the papers?"
Arnav knew he wasn't standing beside him to talk to him about office work.
"How are you?" he instead asked. Akaash looked at his brother in a surprise. He now realised, in years they didn't even have asked how they were.
"I am good!" he said, excited as for the first time he had decided to talk to him.
"Which papers were you talking about?"
Akaash softly laughed as there was no papers that he was talking about.
Arnav laughed back.
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